Round 13

[aj]

I just have to say, Ben really warmed my heart today. He called me earlier today, and we had a really nice non-game conversation. But then, of course, game came up. He just gave me a pitch as to why Cassie and I should keep him, which was honestly tempting. He even said he'd come visit me next week if I kept him, haha. But it was so hard not to take his offer. I just knew it would make him and Dominic so happy, and why wouldn't I want to make their day?! Ben basically just told me that Cassie and I would be golden for f4 if we went with them, which is true. And he said that it's totally possible that Cassie and I will be the next 2 picked off if Dominic wins immunity and Thiago/Henry/Knox vote together. He also said I would gain so much jury respect by making this flip, and I would probably win the whole game. This part, I don't agree with. I honestly don't base a lot of my decisions around jury votes, just because I feel like that's really hard to predict and it's more important to actually get to the end first. But if Cassie and I made that move, we would seriously have no shot at winning. Ben/Dominic's allies would vote for them to win, and our allies would be so mad at us that we wouldn't get their votes. So it's honestly just not logical. I would really rather take the risk of coming in 5th or 4th, but sticking with JABBA.

Anyways, I just kept telling Ben that I had to vote him out, and I told him how bad I felt. He just kept campaigning, but I just stayed strong and told him I couldn't do it. But before we hung up, he told me he still loved me, which honestly meant so much to me. I love him SO much. He's seriously such an amazing friend. I really hope that he doesn't send me a nasty message or post something mean in judgement. Because right now, I seriously am just so touched by the way he acted about the whole situation. He was so understanding. And considering how much of an emotional wreck I was yesterday, I seriously appreciate that so much.

With Ben gone, I've officially made the final 6, which is absolutely incredible and I can't believe I've made it this far. But it's definitely time to start thinking more seriously about end game. I guess I just never seriously considered the fact that Dominic could EASILY go on an immunity run to the final 3. This game is definitely not set in stone yet. Like, it's not at all.

End game....Ugh, so much to think about. I really don't think I have any shot at winning this, but everyone I've talked to says that I can win against anyone except Henry. I don't know if I believe that I can win against everyone else, but I 100000% believe that I can't win against Henry.

It sucks. I honestly would LOVE if Henry won this game. I think he would be such an amazing and deserving winner. And to be honest, there have been times where I considered taking the fall so he could just win this game. However, I'm not going to do that. Voting Henry out would be extremely hard for me, but I think it's what I have to do.

I also know that Henry and Knox will not split up. Knox knows he can't beat Henry in the end, but he said in the conversation he accidentally showed us that he'd "rather be beaten by Henry than others." And in that same conversation, Henry said he definitely wants to take Knox. So, I don't think there is any way to split those 2 up.

You know what that means....THIAGO IS THE SWING VOTE!!!!! lol of course. He apparently told Cassie that he'd be willing to give her his idol because he doesn't think he'll get any votes next round. But Knox might do the same for Henry. So this next judgement is going to be really, really hard.

Cassie says that Thiago has been dropping hints to her about wanting us 3 to be the final 3. However, I have never talked to Thiago about it. I think that there is a good chance he would side with us, because he has to know he can't beat Henry in the end. But I mean, you never know.

Cassie and I are getting super paranoid that we made the wrong decision. If the 3 of them have a "final 3 guys alliance" then we're totally screwed and we're going to look like idiots. It's very, very possible. But I am just trusting that Thiago wants to go to the final 3 with us. By the stuff he's said to Cassie, it sounds like he really does. However, he hasn't talked to me about it at all. I think it's because he's nervous about my relationship with Henry and Knox, so he would rather Cassie talk to me about it. But maybe it's because he's trying to cover all bases, when his real agreement is with Henry and Knox....

Clearly, I am preparing for Dominic to win another immunity. I always prepare for the worst, but I am not going to do too much talking until he officially wins. It'd be nice if we can hold this decision off until final 5, when I won't have to lie to anyone since idols will be a non-factor. But there is a very, very high chance that this decision will have to be made this round. So I need to be prepared.

I'm honestly getting super paranoid now. Did Cassie and I just totally fuck up?

[aj]

A few more developments on end-game were made last night.

First, Dominic messaged Cassie saying that he was Skyping with Henry, and Henry basically revealed that there is, in fact, a “guys alliance.” Cassie showed me the screencaps of this convo she had with Dominic, and it seemed like Dominic was making Henry’s comments into a bigger deal than they were. I guess Henry basically said that if Dominic won immunity, he’d have to vote off Cassie or I, but I mean, isn’t that because of the idol situation? So yeah, Cassie and I really didn’t take this to heart, but Cassie is still just trying to act nice to Dominic and stuff just incase. I find it interesting how Dominic switched from trying to work on me to now working on Cassie. He didn’t say a word to me all day yesterday, which was actually really nice. He stressed me out SO badly that other day, and I know it wasn't intentional, but that’s just his effect on me. And I guess he realized that his abrasive tactics really didn't work out, so he’s trying to work on me through Cassie now? It’s actually been something that’s happened a few times in this game, more so premerge. I think people are worried about my connections and relationships, so they figure that if they can plant seeds on Cassie, she would pass them on to me.

So I guess after this conversation Cassie had with Dominic, Thiago approached Cassie and told her that he wanted to show her something, but she wasn’t allowed to tell me until next round because he wanted to wait. Cassie said yes, but obviously she told me about it since I’m writing about it lol. Thiago showed Cassie a screencap of a convo he had with Knox, where Knox says that he wants me to go at final 5. The fact that Thiago showed Cassie this is like, a huge sign of trust. Why would he do that if he didn’t want to go to the end with us? It also made me feel a lot better because I was having a really hard time processing that I was going to have to vote out Knox, because like I REALLY didn’t want to. Like honestly if JABBA made final 5 and Henry won immunity, I probably would have voted out Thiago because there's no way I'd be able to bring myself to vote out Knox. But now I don’t really have a problem with it.

So yeah, definitely positive developments last night. However, this immunity is totally right up Dominic’s alley. He’s so good at this kind of stuff. So it’s VERY likely that he’s going to win. And if he does, there’s a high chance that I’ll be walking out the door. If Dominic wins, ideally I’d want him, Thiago, Cassie and myself to split the votes between Henry and Knox. However, I don’t know if Dominic and Henry will ever want to work together after this petty drama….So we’ll see. =/ I’m so nervous.

[aj]

Holy oh my gosh. Cassie saved the day and won immunity!!!! Seriously, that was SO close to being a disaster. Cassie won by 2 minutes, which is absolutely crazy.

So obviously this vote isn't a hard decision to make at all. It's a no brainer; it makes no logical sense for ANYONE to keep Dominic in the game. If like Colleen was the last one standing then maybe there would be room for options, but it's Dominic. Thiago's judgement answer was totally right; Dominic has won 7 individual immunities and has 5 friends on a jury of 9. Why would anyone keep him?

But of course, in true Dominic fashion, he went around doing what I assume is his version of campaigning...Which is not very efficient. Involves calling people names and making them feel bad. Here's my convo with him:

Dominic Belli (00:48:03): is there absolutely no way?
AJ (00:50:07): yeah, honestly, i dont know if there's anything. you've played an amazing game and you should be proud
Dominic Belli (00:50:14): kirin
Dominic Belli (00:50:18): everyone keeps telling me that
Dominic Belli (00:50:21): along with how sorry you all are
Dominic Belli (00:50:26): but you're all full of shit
Dominic Belli (00:50:30): and that's just a way to be like "bye"
AJ (00:52:14): i mean, i'm being honest. i wouldnt say that if i didnt mean it
Dominic Belli (01:05:57): you would never turn on your allies?
AJ (01:09:01): correct
Dominic Belli (01:09:18): I think we're done here.
Dominic Belli (01:09:18): Bye.
AJ (01:44:27): I'm sorry you're upset. Have a good night and I'll talk to you later
Dominic Belli (01:44:39): not likely.
AJ (01:44:54): what?
Dominic Belli (01:47:41): nice judgement answer.

So like, when I elaborated on it, he got mad and said I was full of shit, and when I was short and concise, he was mad as well. So I don't know what he wants, honestly. He has to realize that it seriously doesn't make sense for anyone to keep him.

I honestly don't really have much to say. I don't feel bad voting Dominic out, because I don't like the way he's treating me. However, the way he is treating me is making me upset. I really don't feel like I owe him anything in this game. He's just trying to make me feel shitty, and it's working. I'm honestly slightly jealous of Henry and Cassie because Dominic is being nice to them.